Sept. 12, 2013

I was greeted this afternoon by an invitation for a job interview. Say whaaaaat? You don’t serve a sleepyhead that. Anyway, my real first thought was ‘why did I pass my resume for that Copywriter position in the first place?’ I don’t know but I don’t feel this is right. well, that’s a bit of a lie. I trust my intuition, but I can’t just ignore it like nothing happened. Like I received nothing. I can pretend, but that would leave a stigma on me. So, I asked if they can reschedule me.

They replied positively. Gaaah. That’s not what I wannnt. Fine. Maybe, I should give it a shot. I can always refuse an offer anyway. Fear just got ahead of me a while back, possibly. I was caught unprepared by the text. I just woke up, my senses weren’t in their proper places yet. Plus, I’m not ready emotionally, too. Hate to admit it, but I always need enough time to condition my system for incoming changes, especially for significant ones like this. This is why I don’t enjoy too much spontaneity, well, most of the time.

Another thing, I don’t see it as a possible upgrade. You may think that something is wrong with me for thinking that things shouldn’t be this easy. It shouldn’t be if it’s intended to last. I have to be critical, examine things always with a grain of salt.

The main reason why I’m having this quest for a new job, a day job, is money with a capital M! I’m silently praying that I wouldn’t have to swallow my pride at the end of this search. That I wouldn’t settle for a dumb job for the sake of money. But I know, too, that for the next 22 months, I have to make my profession more about money. Sacrifice my personal fulfillment. I can delay it for more or less two years, right? :{ I need money (yeah, the root of all evil) to pay for the house’s equity. That’s one thing that’s keeping me brave now — we’re buying a house! :D) although it hurts to leave the company, ‘hopeless place’ as we used to call it, and the friendship that was founded there, I have to make this decision to leave and pursue it. Be strong. *sobs*

I’m also considering getting a part-time job after defeating this untimely quest. No, not for the sake of money this time. There still remains some dignity, at the very least. 😉 I will make sure that my next job will provide enough and more or I’d rather stay here, where I’m comfortable. I simply want to be busy/active/in demand. Hehe Can you call that vanity? Silly, but it is my dream to be a workaholic. Lol. Seriously. If I ain’t lucky enough to score some extra money, I would just give more time to the church. Nukss. I want to satisfy my heart. I want to feed my soul. I have to feed this noble beast in me through other aspects of my life.

On a somewhat related news, I did achieve one thing lately. Yes, I deserve a pat on the head. XD I got my certificate for the Nihonggo class I enrolled in last June. I can now construct Japanese sentences, though in their basic form. The thing is, I PASSED! Accumulated another skill, yeah! ;)) it’s in my bucket list to learn foreign languages. Next goal would be to learn a form of martial arts and that would be after I get a decent job. Bless me.

Nihongo class pictures!! ^.^
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